Are You Prepared for Your Divorce?
Divorce is one of life's most challenging and emotionally charged experiences. It involves the dissolution of a once-promising partnership and entails various legal, emotional, and financial complexities. Preparing for divorce is crucial to ensure you navigate the process as smoothly as possible.
If you consider the time and effort spent on planning a wedding, a divorce may require even more.
In this comprehensive guide, we will delve into the intricate details of how to prepare for divorce on emotional, legal, and financial fronts.
1. Protect Your Technology
a. Add or Change Passwords on computers, phones and individual bank accounts. Do not share with anyone.
b. Do not use shared family calendars or any visible calendars for your divorce related appointments
c. Create a new email address to use solely for divorce related communications
d. Protect your documents, journaling, etc. Get a small safety deposit box for the documents your spouse should not see
2. Hire Your Divorce Team – Invest in Yourself
a. CDC Certified Divorce Coach® - guides you through the entire process and prepares you for each step to come. Works with you on emotions, negotiation, communication, parenting plans and more.
b. Certified Divorce Financial Analyst® (CDFA®) - analyzes your financial position pre- and post-divorce. Talk to them about what levels of spousal support and child support are possible under your state’s laws.
c. Legal Professional – Attorney guides you through the ins and outs of the confusing legal process. Makes sure your process and agreements are in your best interest and legal.
3. Emotional Preparation
Emotional readiness is the foundation for effectively managing a divorce. Here's how you can prepare yourself emotionally:
a. Seek professional guidance: Hire a divorce coach to help you cope with the emotional turmoil that often accompanies divorce. They can provide valuable strategies for dealing with stress, anxiety, and grief.
b. Establish a support system: Lean on positive friends and family for emotional support. Joining a support group for individuals going through divorce can also be immensely helpful, as it connects you with people who understand your struggles. Remember also that your friend’s divorce is different than yours. They have good intentions, but may not have all the facts.
c. Self-care is essential: Prioritize self-care by focusing on your physical and mental well-being. Regular exercise, proper nutrition, and mindfulness techniques like meditation and journaling can help you manage stress.
d. Manage expectations: Understand that divorce can be an unpredictable process. Be prepared for unexpected setbacks and be flexible in your approach to negotiations. Prepare for these setbacks and next steps with your divorce coach.
2. Legal Preparation
Navigating the legal aspects of divorce is crucial to protect your rights and interests. Here's a detailed look at how to prepare legally:
a. Learn about the divorce laws in your state and the types of divorce available – litigation, mediation, arbitration, pro se, etc
b. Consult with an attorney: Depending on the type of divorce selected hire the appropriate legal professionals. Interview 2-3 attorneys to determine who is the right fit for you and have a consultation. Write down your list of questions before hand for the meeting. The attorney that a friend recommends is not necessarily the best fit for you.
c. No matter which type of divorce you select, you will want an attorney to review any documents before you sign the. Hire an experienced divorce attorney who specializes in family law. They will explain your rights, guide you through the legal process, and advocate for your best interests.
d. Discuss custody arrangements: If you have children, work with your attorney to finalize a parenting plan that outlines custody, visitation, and child support arrangements. Prioritize your children's well-being throughout the process.
e. Determine spousal support: Depending on your situation, be prepared to discuss alimony or spousal support. Your attorney can help you determine if it applies in your case.
f. Protect your credit: Close any joint credit accounts to prevent your spouse from incurring additional debt in your name. Establish individual credit accounts to build your credit history independently.
3. Financial Preparation
Divorce can have a substantial impact on your financial stability. Hire a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst to guide you through this complex process. Taking proactive steps can help you secure your financial future:
a. Open individual financial accounts: Establish personal bank accounts and credit cards in your name to regain financial independence. Ensure you have a separate account for child-related expenses if necessary.
b. Gather financial records: Compile all financial documents, such as bank statements, tax returns, investment portfolios, and property deeds. Having these readily available will expedite the divorce proceedings.
c. Inventory assets and debts: Create a comprehensive list of all marital assets and debts, including real estate, vehicles, bank accounts, retirement funds, and outstanding loans. This inventory will be vital for property division negotiations.
d. Update beneficiaries and legal documents: Review and update beneficiaries on life insurance policies, retirement accounts, and any estate planning documents, such as wills and trusts. Do this only if your attorney approves.
e. Create a post-divorce budget: Develop a detailed budget that reflects your financial situation after the divorce. Consider expenses like housing, utilities, transportation, child support, and legal fees.
f. Evaluate assets and debts: Work closely with your attorney to determine a fair and equitable division of assets and debts. Ensure that you receive a fair settlement that aligns with your financial goals.
Preparing for divorce is a multifaceted process that involves careful consideration of emotional, legal, and financial aspects. By addressing each of these areas comprehensively, you can better navigate the complexities of divorce and emerge from the process with a sense of control and confidence in your future.
Remember that seeking professional guidance from a therapist and an experienced divorce attorney is essential to ensure a successful transition into the next chapter of your life. While divorce is undoubtedly challenging, it can also provide an opportunity for personal growth and a fresh start.
Meet the author Beverly Price
Beverly Price, of Her Empowered Divorce, has helped thousands of women navigate the complex journey of divorce. Through increasing her client’s knowledge, skills and support, her clients can be informed and prepared participants for the most successful divorce process possible. Her one-on-one coaching process includes extensive preparation, legal and financial education, emotional management, communication and negotiation skills, empowerment and support.
While Beverly is not an attorney, therapist or financial professional, she herself has 30 years of divorce coaching experience and a personal history with co-parenting, domestic violence, multiple divorces, single working motherhood and more.
Learn more and connect with Beverly:
Website: herempowereddivorce.com
Instagram: @her_empowered_divorce
LinkedIn: Beverly Price
Facebook: Her Empowered Divorce
Note: The author, compiler and publisher do not assume and hereby disclaim any liability to any party due to these words coming from the author’s own opinion based on their experiences. This account is based on the author’s own personal experience. We assume no responsibility for errors or omissions in these articles.
